Naija issues

St-Rémy Gbedu Slam Jam heads to Vegas Club

The St-Rémy Gbedu Slam Jam excitement continues this month (June) as the authentic world No.1 French brandy keeps faith with its promise of unlimited fun through the rest of the year 2012 for its loyal consumers by taking the next of its monthly club parties to The Vegas Club, Ikeja, Lagos on the 22nd June, 2012.

The trendy fun lovers of St-Remy at the Rita Lori Hotel on the 18th of May 2012 experienced an amazing fun filled night of the first St-Remy star-studded party in the monthly series of St-Remy Gbedu Slam Jam. The party continues this month at Vegas Club, as some of Nigeria’s finest acts all come together once again to make this month’s party an equally unforgettable experience for all in attendance. Don’t be left out of this exclusive party as the amazing DJ Atte of Naija 102.7 FM mounts the wheels of steel, with Rayce, General Pype, Orezi and JJC Skills live in the house as the brand is set to once again give its faithful and indeed all fun-lovers an exceptional Gbedu Slaming night to remember.

According to St-Rémy Brand & Marketing Manager, Antoine Couvreur, these events are specifically designed to not only ensure that it rewards its loyal consumers who over the years have stayed true to the brand, but to also create more awareness about the brand’s growing influence and acceptance across Nigeria and the rest of the world.

The St-Rémy Gbedu Slam Jam monthly party is proudly supported by Naija FM 102.7 and TRACE Urban TV.

Its gonna be awesome!!!!!

CCTVs coming to Lagos

The Lagos State government in collaboration with the Federal Government is installing CCTVs in strategic locations around Lagos metropolis.

Area Boys & Girls....make una go hide oooooo!Uncle fash haff catch you now.

Another International Award Nomination For Funmi Iyanda and Chris Dada

It’s another international nod for production duo Funmi Iyanda and Chris Dada as Chopcassava.com, their innovative web series documenting the recent fuel subsidy protests was nominated as best web series in the non-fiction category at the BANFF World Media Festival, which took place last week in Alberta, Canada...

Dubbed the "the Olympics of television" by pundits, the Banff World Media Festival –also known as the Rockies --is an annual international media event dedicated to celebrating the best in world television and digital media production. The event which has honoured the likes of Jim Carrey, this year paid tribute to legendary CNN talk show host Larry King.

Seminars were also given by a host of Industry heavyweights including Chuck Lorre – the creator of Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half men and Roseanne. The 2012 Rockies ended on a dramatic note with a fantastic themed party in the mountains hosted by the distributors of Mad Men and Breaking Bad. Stars of their new hit show – ‘Hell on Wheels’ were present including hip hop star – Common

Chopcassava,com which was independently produced by Iyanda & Dada was up against five other nominees in the non fiction web series category.

Speaking on the nomination, Funmi Iyanda and Chris Dada said: “It was a great honour to be invited to Banff and a fantastic experience meeting the luminaries behind some of the biggest shows in television in the world”

“As the only African representatives it felt good to fly Nigeria’s flag at such a prestigious event.”

In 2011, My Country Nigeria, a documentary also produced by Funmi Iyanda and Chris Dada was nominated for a Monte Carlo Television Festival Award.

Adultery!!!!

Caught in the act!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lady smuggles snake into PDP rally

An attempt by a woman to smuggle snake into the Samuel Ogbemudia stadium-venue of Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) campaign rally in Benin on Saturday was foiled by vigilant policemen at the gate of the stadium.

Vice President Namadi Sambo, national and state leaders of and several thousands of PDP supporters had converged on the stadium to officially kick-start the election campaign of the party's candidate in the July 14 governorship election in the state, Gen. Charles Airhiavbere (retd.)

But the timely interception at the main gate of the stadium by policemen at the gate of the stadium averted what could have created a chaotic atmosphere, had the woman sneaked into the stadium with her deadly package undetected.

The snake woman, adorned in purple top and blue pair of trousers, in company of three young men, attracted the curiosity of the mobile policemen screening those going into the stadium when she attempted to jump the long queue.

Upon interrogation, the snake,a cobra measuring about one metre was discovered in a white round transparent plastic container with perforated lid in the hand of the woman who spoke in Pidgin English and Hausa languages.

The security agents however saved the woman from the wrath of the angry crowd who attempted to mob her.

She was however ordered to leave the vicinity of the stadium while still clutching her snake in her hand.

When PMNEWS attempted to take the photograph of the snake and speak with the woman and her companions, she angrily threatened to open and release the reptile if she was not left alone.

BATTLE OF THE JOGS.....WHO IS MORE ENDOWED

Guys..........quick poll, who is more JOGGGGGGED *heheheheheheheh*

ON A LIGHTER NOTE.............ADULT HUMOR

A man went to a pet shop and bought a talking parrot. He took the parrot home, and tried to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead the parrot just swore at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird finally the man said "If you don't stop swearing I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment." The parrot continued, so finally the man put the bird in the freezer.
About an hour later the parrot asked the man to please open the door. As the man took the shivering bird out of the freezer he asked the bird if it had learned its lesson. The parrot said "I sure did. By the way, what the fuck did that turkey do?"

Q: What's the difference between an epileptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
A: An epileptic oyster shucker shucks between fits.

This cowboy is taking a herd of horses to market. After dropping them off he is very hungry and decided to stop and eat. The town is very small and there is only one diner. He walks in and finds only one seat is left. It is next to a nice looking, obviously wealthy young lady. The cowboy sits down in the seat next to her.
The waiter comes by and asks the woman if she was ready to order.
She replied: "Yes, I would like the breast of fowl. Virgin fowl. Make sure the bird is a virgin. In fact why don't you catch the bird yourself for me. I would like new potatoes, and garnish my plate with parsley. And I would like a cup of coffee, not to hot or not to cold, and if there is any foam on the coffee please scoop it off for me. And while you're at it, please open a window! I smell horse, there must be a cowboy in here.
Well, the cowboy was sitting right next to her, and he was very offended at that comment.
Shortly the waiter came back with the woman's coffee and asked the cowboy if he was ready to order.
He said "Yes, I would like the duck. Fucked duck. Fuck the bird yourself. Garnish my plate with horse shit and bring me a cup of coffee hotter that Texas mule piss and blow the foam off with a fart. And while you're up, knock out a wall. I smell cunt, there must be a whore in here.

Q: What's the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a woman's track team?
A: A tribe of pigmy's is a cunning bunch of runts.

Two guys are out golfing, an out on the back 9 they see sheep with it's head stuck in the fence. One of the two says "Look, I haven't had a woman in quite a while and that sheep is looking pretty good right now. Just don't say anything about this"

So he heads over to the sheep, pulls down his pants, and has his way with the poor animal. When he comes back to the golf cart he says to his friend "Hey, that felt pretty good. You want a turn?"

The second golfer replies "Hell yes!" and walks over and puts his head in the fence.

This redneck calls home from the hospital and says "Honey, I've got some bad news. I cut off my finger at work."
His wife asks "The whole finger?"
The redneck replies "No, the one next to it"

A man limps into a bar with a cane and alligator. The bartender stops him and says "Hold on a second here - you can't bring that animal in here, they aren't allowed!" So the man says, "But my gator here does a really cool trick..."

The bartender says "Well then, lets see!" So the man whips out his dick and shoves it in the gators mouth. He then takes his cane and starts bashing the gator in the head with it. A crowd gathers around and everyone is astonished when he pulls out his dick without a single scratch.

He looks around at the crowd and says, "Does anyone else want to try?" An old lady raises her hand and says..."Sure, but don't hit me with that stick."

Q. What is the cheapest meat?
A. Deer balls, there under a buck

Q. What does an old woman have between her breasts that a young woman doesn't?
A. A navel.

Q. Your dog is barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's banging on the front door wanting in. Which one do you let in?
A. The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breath through that?"

Q. What does a drunk walrus and woman at a Tupperware party have in common?
A. They're both out looking for a tight seal.

Q. What's the difference between your paycheck and your penis?
A. Your wife blows your paycheck!

Q. What's in the toilet of the Starship Enterprise?
A. The captains log.

Q. What do cowboy hats and hemorrhoids have in common?
A. Sooner or later, every asshole gets one.

Q. What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies?
A. A bingo game.

Q. Did you hear about the priest that went to Mount Olive?
A. Popeye almost killed him!